When Tom Hanks as Forest Gump made famous the phrase, “Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you’re goin’ta get,” something bothered me about that statement. It was a great line delivered well enough to earn a best actor award, but maybe I just decided to think too much about it. It wasn’t just that I don’t like chocolate, because even without eating it I could understand the metaphor, it was, I guess, my hope that life is not so random. In some ways I get it, life can throw so many things at us. Babies coming nine weeks early, stage four cancer, job loss, a move, a new relationship, a great opportunity who knows, but maybe his point was that even if you don’t like what’s in the center at least for the person who likes chocolate it’s still chocolate. Life for me however is not those things. Those things happen, they are events, but life is lived in the choices we make in the midst of what happens. I get the random event part, I really do, and I suppose you choose which chocolate to try, but as a person who believes in free will while at the same time acknowledging the interaction of God with the world I don’t think there are bad things in the center unless we let them be. There are hard things, horrible things that happen, that should not happen, but if we let those things be life then it’s like evil wins. I was stuck in an airport the other day and I kind of forgot to eat as I tried to figure out my next move, so when I got hungry my choices were more limited as things closed down. One of the places open was a candy store. It was this colorful cacophony of bins filled with all sorts of candies and a big sign repeated in several places, “all candy $2.99/lb mixing is ok.” All of a sudden that line came into my head and I realized this was my metaphor to counter the box of chocolates. There were lots of candies and yes you might choose some that you ended up not liking at all, but you get to make your own mix. It was a limited selection but you could do with it what you chose to do with it. I went with jellybeans. I created a mixture of six or seven different kinds (going a little overboard in terms of quantity). At first they were all separate staying where they were deposited, but after a bit they became mixed. I chose the flavors. I created the mix. Stuff may get thrown into the mix and I can’t eat just jellybeans, but I can go to them when what’s thrown at me tastes bad. I can turn to the mix that I chose and say this is life. That other stuff is what it is and no matter how bad it might be, there are these good things I put in my bag of jellybeans, my flavors. I live in the mix I choose, the mix I create, that is life and the difficult things I have to learn from, spit them out, recover from or do my best to avoid, but I refuse to let them be my life.